He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
