Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Randomize
