I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Randomize
