you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
