WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
