Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
My bed smells like the plague
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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