The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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