Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
