Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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