I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
