forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
