Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
