ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize