Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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