what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize