My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
it hurts more in the daytime
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
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