I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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