I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
