Kareoke will never be a sober sport
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
