we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
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She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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