I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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