we're chasing vodka with high fives
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
PANTIES FOUND
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