Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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