Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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