just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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