1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
