i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
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It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
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Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.