I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize
