I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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