I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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