I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
