It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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