i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
