sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
