Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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