Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
that's an acceptable place to lick
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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