Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
This house was built for laser tag.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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