Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
