I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
