I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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