yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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