i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
