So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Randomize
