i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
