It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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