But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
