Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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