What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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