I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
