Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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